Manchester United’s April Fools…
Hold onto your boots, footie fans! Manchester United’s April 1st antics against Nottingham Forest were no laughing matter, unless you’re into slapstick comedy — and we are! A shocking stat has emerged comparing the great goal-shy duo: Rasmus Hojlund and Harry Maguire. In a plot twist that even Monty Python couldn’t script, our beloved slab-head Maguire racked up more xG in the dying embers of the game than Hojlund has in his last 15 grand appearances! Move over Ronaldo, there’s a new target man in town.
The game at the City Ground was like watching a cat chase its own tail — exciting until you remember it’s just dizzying chaos. Despite boasting an xG buffet of 2.27 against Forest’s light snack of 0.61, United couldn’t find the back of the net if it was the size of Manchester itself. Maguire joined the striker ranks with three last-gasp attempts that sent Forest’s defense into a tizzy. Alas, those attempts were blocked like a teenager’s social media account, leaving fans with nothing but broken dreams and blocked shots.
Meanwhile, Hojlund was busier than a squirrel in a nut factory managing a solitary shot in the whole shindig. Though we shouldn’t fault his ambition, his conversion rate makes someone like Maguire look like a golden boot contender. Hojlund’s grand total of 17 shots in 15 matches with only four bothering the keepers says more about his form than any master striker would care to admit. Tune into ‘Manchester is Red’ for more banter-filled breakdowns of this merry-go-round of football fun!
