Europa League: United vs Sociedad Banana Peel…

Hold on to your boots, folks. Manchester United and Real Sociedad are set to tango in the Europa League, but someone forgot the players! Thursday night is shaping up to be a comedy of errors at the Reale Arena, with both teams fielding what could amount to Sunday league squads.

Our beloved Ruben Amorim is sweating bullets as he’s forced to jot down a United lineup that reads like a phone directory of the injured. From martial arts expert Lisandro Martinez and wing wizard Luke Shaw to “Oops, I’m injured again” Mason Mount and Jonny Evans – none will feature. Not to mention, Harry Maguire plodding about with more worries on his mind than an exam-taker on test day.

Sociedad isn’t faring much better either. They’re pondering their version of “Where’s Waldo?” as Alvaro Odriozola, Arsen Zakharyan, and a band of merry men aim to escape the injury shackles. Fresh off a Barca bulldozing, only their suspended but now-free trio of Sherlado Becker, Takefusa Kubo, and Nayef Aguerd are the lads to bring some semblance of normalcy back for this boisterous bout. Onwards to the Europa League merry-go-round!