Gunners Fielding a Five-Star Injury List…
Arsenal fans, brace yourselves for another nail-biter against Manchester United! The Gunners are set to battle the Red Devils with half their squad missing, leaving Arteta with the challenge of a lifetime. After all, who needs a striker when you have determination, right?
Things have not been looking rosy for Manchester United either, who are desperately trying to find their winning mojo, on a scavenger hunt through Old Trafford, searching for the Premier League form handbook. With Arsenal hobbling onto the pitch, United smells blood in the water – or maybe that’s just Arteta’s strong cologne?
On the Arsenal injury list, we’ve got Havertz, with a hamstring that’s more torn than a teenage love letter, and Martinelli, who’s left his hamstring somewhere between London and Newcastle. Saka’s been out longer than a Hollywood movie sequel, and Tomiyasu could start a knee injury support group with Jesus, who’s off on a three-month vacation from football!
Arteta, with the wisdom of a fortune cookie, assures fans that their problems are “not looking good at all,” but hey, no football fan appreciates an injury-free season, do they? Buckle in, Gooners – Sunday promises to be an emotional roller coaster!