Man United’s Bonkers Path to Europe…
Manchester United fans have had a rollercoaster season they’d rather forget—like, the ride at the fair where you drop your cotton candy. Despite being parked at an unlucky 13th place in the Premier League, the Red Devils have a couple of zany routes to European glory. Option one: go full Jason Bourne and win the Europa League. United needs to leap over Lyon next month, and then potentially take on frenemy Tottenham Hotspur at a final showdown in Bilbao. Sounds simple, right? Just beat everyone!
But if Sir Alex Ferguson’s lucky horseshoe fails, there’s the truly bananas Plan B straight out of a spy novel. First, a miracle must elevate United from the depths of the league. Picture this: they need Liverpool, Arsenal, Nottingham Forest, and Manchester City to nab the Champions League spots. Then, Newcastle slips into the Champions League through a backdoor spot. The real magic happens when Brighton and Bournemouth also grab Europa spots, Chelsea collapses to eighth yet wins the Conference League, and Aston Villa? Champions League glory!
In this madcap scenario, Newcastle’s conference spot goes unclaimed, gifting an 11th place team—*drumroll* Brentford, usually—a European ticket. With Brentford and Crystal Palace ahead, and Spurs lagging, United hilariously enough might have to pray for poetic football chaos. Ruben Amorim, strap in—it’s Europe or bust!
