Johnson’s Comic Capers Versus United…
Brennan Johnson isn’t snoozing on Tottenham’s glorious trifecta over Manchester United. Nope, the lad’s as hyper-alert as a caffeinated squirrel! Spurs have given United the ol’ bump three times this season, a feat crafted under the mysterious wizardry of Ruben Amorim after Erik ‘Tactical-Meerkat’ ten Hag took a scenic route out. With a 3-0 whallop in September, a rollercoaster 4-3 Carabao Cup knockout, and a tight-squeeze 1-0 in February, Johnson cheerfully chirps that these matches ain’t ghostwriting this Wednesday’s script!
‘Chaps, listen up!’ says Captain Johnson, flashing a grin wider than an excited kid with a fresh sticker book. ‘We can’t swagger into the final thinking we’ve got them puppies beat. Each win was crafted with a sprinkle of tactical pixie dust. We need to conjure a peppery potion of preparation!’ Johnson’s scoring escapade at Old Trafford was a fireworks show for his pop, David – Nottingham Forest legend, and former-Man-United-playground-participant. Johnson Jr. is basking in his moonlit 17-goal season, tapping in finishes like he’s playing Whack-a-Mole at a funfair!
Thanks to a little nudge from the ‘Gandalf of the Goalposts,’ Ange Postecoglou, Johnson is all about those back-post delights. ‘Sure, a tap-in might look like pie, but if you ain’t there, it’s just a cozy corner kick for the ducks.’ Johnson’s goal-getting mischief propelled Spurs’ 5-1 victory over Bodo/Glimt, and with European shenanigans being their holy grail, Johnson exclaims, ‘We’ve tangoed through some gnarly European fortresses and come out singing, ‘We Are the Champions!’ Our bond is stronger than a bulldog at a biscuit factory!’
