Bruno Fernandes turns down Al Nassr move…

Saucy rumors swirled as Bruno Fernandes kept fans guessing about his future, almost causing Manchester United supporters to faint from suspense. Despite a glitzy offer the size of a small country’s GDP from Al-Hilal, Fernandes chose to stay put at Old Trafford. It turns out Al Nassr also wanted a slice of the Bruno pie. Their manager, Jorge Jesus, admitted he had hoped to nab the Portuguese dynamo, only to discover Fernandes was as immovable as a stubborn mule on game day.

When asked about his choice, Fernandes humorously revealed he didn’t need a magic eight ball to decide his future, just a chat with his wife. “She asked me what I wanted with my life,” he shared, possibly while balancing a football on his head. Bruno decided to continue dazzling the Old Trafford faithful instead of cozying up with buddies like Ruben Neves and João Cancelo in Saudi Arabia. His massive trophy cabinet seems to be needing another shelf, as he clinched the Sir Matt Busby Player of the Year award for the fourth time. With his Manchester United contract extending until 2027, the Red Devils can rest easy knowing their midfield magician isn’t vanishing anytime soon.