The Case of the Missing Harry Amass…
In a plot twist more bewildering than finding a football in your cereal bowl, Manchester United’s left back, Harry Amass, has been air-dropped into Loan Land for the coming season! The 18-year-old phenom has been ghosted from United’s friendly against Leeds and is missing from their Chicago-bound plane. It’s as if Hogwarts called to borrow him for Quidditch practice!
With Amass kicked into the loan carousel, United might now be whipping out their shopping list for a new left-sided sparkle. Remember that guy Patrick Dorgu bought for a sum fit for buying Mars? Yep, ÂŁ25 million with turbo boosters to ÂŁ29m! Meanwhile, Luke “Bionic” Shaw, who’s been collecting injuries like they’re PokĂ©mon, just turned the big Three-Oh. Curious how Diego Leon, the new Paraguayan whiz kid, will fit into this Lego set — will he fill the void or be ‘Mr. Unseen’?
Poor Harry bravely joined from Watford in 2023 and lit up last year’s pre-season like a Roman candle. Mysteriously absent during the Community Shield clash, United bizarrely slotted right-wing wizard Facundo Pellistri at left back instead. Cue chaos as Amass finally made his appearance against Leicester City like an unexpected birthday cake. Will the mystery of Mister Harry Amass resolve, or shall we find him with Bigfoot in the land of the unknown?
