Andy Robertson Sings Scotty’s Serie A Serenade…
Hold onto your football helmets, folks! Liverpool’s own Andy Robertson is playing the melody of a buddy-buddy ballad for his Scottish chum, Scott “Goal Machine” McTominay! After being secretly smuggled out of the Manchester United camp for a whopping £25.7 million (who knew transfer fees were this entertaining?), McTominay blasted his way to fame in Italy like a footballing James Bond. Napoli fans have declared him king, knight, and probably mayor of pizza town, after a jaw-dropping 13 goal season that led them to wear the crown of Serie A champions yet again!
So, why on Earth did United let their Scottish sensation escape like a swift squirrel from a hungry cat? Former United boss Erik ten Hag might be scratching his head so much it resembles a grumpy porcupine. Despite his previous Old Trafford streak of terrorizing defenses with ten-thumping goals, McTominay was shipped off as if he was a pair of old boots. But thanks to some smart “profit and sustainability” hocus pocus, United at least got a shiny gold star on their financial wizardry wall!
Meanwhile, Andy Robertson provides a side of banter, claiming McTominay lacks the respect in the Premier League as he leapt from being a spare tire on United’s wheel to full-blown Italian stallion. Now crowned the football king of the bratwursts (sorry, that’s sausages), uh, pizzas, signore McTominay is taking over Serie A like a Scottish serenading Superman in cleats! Whether the United brains trust regrets letting him gallop away, we shall leave to the sticky spaghetti strand of future folklore!
