When Pests Outplay the Red Devils…
Once upon a time in the magical land of Old Trafford, the Red Devils were set upon by an unexpected adversary—tiny invaders more challenging than any top-tier Premier League team! Alas, after the gut-wrenching defeat to Tottenham, Manchester United received another unwelcome visitor: an abysmal two-star food hygiene rating handed down by the cleanliness referees at the Food Standards Agency. With the flair of Lionel Messi dribbling on a soggy pitch, mouse droppings showed up, leaving more marks than Ronaldo’s dazzling footsteps.
It appears the persistent mice had slipped through the net of Manchester United’s formidable hygiene defense, scooting around like they were trying out for the next secret weapon in the team’s lineup. Inspectors claimed the stadium kitchens had more dirt accumulation than the time Mourinho last parked the bus, and it smelled worse than a used shin pad left in the locker room! Mouse droppings were discovered everywhere, from the grand Manchester Suite to the Devil’s very own bar, and the droppings were not even fresh, just like that penalty Lingard used to miss!
The droppings drama was just the tip of the iceberg lettuce. Trafford Council inspectors took a long, disappointed look through the cleaning squad’s match tactics. They spotted a dirty plate stacker, food debris partying harder than a post-match celebration, and fridges harboring mystery gunk. Staff were apparently caught offside, having missed a tripped fuse that turned hot water into a defender’s worst nightmare—cold water! But hold onto your football beanies, because not all hope is lost! A spokesperson for the club was quick to assure that they have a ‘robust’ plan in play to tackle these mousetraps head-on. With a wink and a nod, they promised swift action ensuring that this mishap gets whisked away faster than a Sanchez transfer rumor.
