Youngster Picks Strasbourg Over United…
Watch out, there’s a new twist in the teenage football soap opera! Manchester United went in gung-ho, waving their checkbooks like old-school treasure hunters in hopes of grabbing the teenage sensation, Tyrese Noubissie. But alas, in this footie fable, Strasbourg came galloping in on a French baguette of a development plan and snatched the young virtuoso right from under their noses.
The Red Devils were salivating, counting their future trophies, convinced the 16-year-old maestro from Man City would soon be dribbling magic at Old Trafford. But Brexit stepped in, like an unexpected ref throwing a banana on the pitch, meaning United have to lure talents from their own soggy island. Noubissie, captaining France’s Under-16 squad, lovingly kissed Etihad goodbye while singing odes to City, stubbornly strolling towards a French future filled with cheese and croissants.
“It’s just time to turn a new page!” crooned Noubissie, packing his bags of teenage dreams. He cherished his City badge like a lucky charm, thanking everyone from coaches to tea ladies (probably). The recent winner of the KDB Cup leaves Manchester waving from a baguette-shaped boat, off to conquer the land of Strasbourg, with a grin plastered wider than the English Channel. Au revoir, Old Blighty!
