Tottenham Duo Prep for Epic Final Battle!

Spurs Lads Get Spruced for Showdown!…

Hold onto your boots, footie fans, because Tottenham’s enchanted wizard of sport, Ange Postecoglou, has delivered some feet-tickling news! Son Heung-min, once thought to have been bewitched by an evil heel goblin, has bounced back from a foot injury faster than a kangaroo on a pogo stick! After slipping into the game for a grand 32 minutes against Crystal Palace, Son’s been declared physically primed and ready to rumble against the marauding Red Devils of Man United in the Europa League final clash in Bilbao. Postecoglou’s plan? Inflate Son with infinite fitness, like a balloon blown up by the breath of a thousand fans!

But wait, there’s more! Dejan ‘The Dazzler’ Kulusevski took a little ‘owlchemy shock’ in the leg department during the Palace fiasco — it’s said to be nothing more than a tasty knock on the knee. Fear not, brave Tottenham supporters! Word from the crystal ball suggests it’s just knee grumbling, and like a moody teenager, it should settle down after sulking for 24 hours. Will Dejan be ready to jet-pack back onto the field? We sure hope so, as Spurs are sharpening their spikes for one final dance.

If you crave more of this pulsating play-by-play, fret not! The Manchester team’s geek squad has all the historical undertones and Homer-esque analyses you need. Dive into their web of gossip by subscribing to their newsletters, or engage in a foot-tapping jamboree with their audio wonderment — the Manchester is Red podcast, a festival of heavenly footie banter. All adventures in the realms of Spotify, Apple, and YouTube await your eager ears. Get in there, and let the footie chuckles commence!